Hooked by Joe S. McIlhaney Jr

Author:Joe S. McIlhaney, Jr. [McIlhaney, Joe S.; Bush, Freda McKissic]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 978-1-57567-398-1
Publisher: Moody Publishers
Published: 2008-12-24T05:00:00+00:00

Living Together: Just another choice?

“Of course, you should try on shoes before you buy them.”

“Naturally, you’ll test-drive a car, before you invest in it.”

“Certainly, you and your significant other should live together before marriage to see if it’ll work out.”

Which of these statements doesn’t fit? The last, obviously, but why? Are there solid, proven reasons not to cohabit? Yes.

It’s clear that many people choose to live with a significant other without the added commitment of marriage.7 It is sometimes seen as a kind of trial phase, a time to learn about each other and find out if you are compatible. Some of these couples may be monogamous and may be very much in love, but research indicates that this is a dangerous choice for their futures. Those who study this choice, also known as cohabitation, find that a large group of individuals enter that relationship with no plans at all of it ever becoming a marriage. They simply enjoy the comfort and convenience of living with and having sex with a person and are satisfied with that arrangement until something happens to make it unhappy and then they move on.

Cohabitation has become very common. In fact, by the age of twenty, approximately the same number of young people live in cohabiting relationships as are married (20 percent).8 People entering a cohabiting relationship are often virgins before starting into this type of sexual relationship. All too often, cohabitation is a compromise—a partial commitment in exchange for the rights and benefits that research shows are enjoyed most in a lifelong commitment. Overwhelming evidence shows that an intimate relationship with an “out clause” generally does not fulfill the anticipation of those who choose such an arrangement. Rather than providing benefits, this type of relationship often produces problems.

Consider the following facts:

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